Cockblocked by Alcoholics Anonymous

Last night I was supposed to have a date with a cute little redhead, but then she canceled on me at the last minute. Why??? Because it conflicted with the lame ass rules of her AA meetings. Cockblocked by AA!

Apparently the people running AA, they recommend that people attending the meetings do not date for a year! WTF?! Let's put our life on hold for a whole fucking year! Can you come up with a better way to send them back to the bottle?! Dumbass!

The other problem is the people never drinking again. The alcohol isn't the problem, it's the people! A person that becomes a huge fucking fat ass isn't told to never fucking eat again. Do you tell a workaholic to never work again?! They're told to eat reasonably, work less, set limits... How healthy is it for someone to be told to never do something again because they can't control themselves?!

Down with AA! I will teach these people how to live a fuller life, which is not by avoiding it! I hope a rebounding alchy runs them over on the way back from a meeting!!

Feebleness' New All Time Low

Today I will rant about hearing aids and the futility and irony of them.

Today at work my co-worker minion, a 70 year old fart, was talking with another older man in the same "knock, knock, knocking on coffins door" stage of life. The worst and most ironic part of it all was they were talking about their hearing aids. It's as ironic as bulimics with chubby cheeks, but not quite as cool or trendy...

What a waste of batteries! Talking about your hearing aid. What is even the point of having a hearing aid anyways? By the time you're decrepidly old you've pretty much heard everything anyways! All you can talk about your dietary blend of pills that keep you alive...

The worst part is now they can hear the Grim Reaper coming. I wish at times when he crossed the road he would get run over by a car. Now, thanks to his fucking Miracle Ear chances are he'll hear the motorcade of death. Shitty.

Lucky for me I can still bang on loud pieces of metal (with MY ear plugs in) and create such a ruckus that it will drive the codger with his bionic ear to new levels of deafness! So eventually he will have to have such a large amplified hearing aid the weight may break his withering neck.